Common ground and vulnerability are the currencies of a good friendship. Oddly they can turn on us and form the basis of an enemy relationship. We become too focused on what makes us different.
When this happens, we need revert to the abstract to gain alignment. This practice is good for you and your adversary. For example, you may be in a tumultuous position with your aunt who is a conspiracy theorist and won’t vaccinate her children as you do, but your opposite concrete positions are also abstract positions you share: You both care for and love your children. You both are willing to question the status quo.
You can change the subject by moving the level of abstraction of the subject. These abstract pieces are essentially virtues. This way of speaking is what politicians use to connect with interest groups. See ../using-the-abstract-and-the-concrete-to-connect-with-people.
These are tools that can be used to make friends, make peace, or even in place of aggression in a debate you want to win.